An mp3 and a blog of note

I've been trying, for a couple of days now, to post an mp3 on the site but as yet, have had no luck. It's a great track called "When I Go Down" by Relient K. The reason I wanted to post it was to document what I've been feeling this last week or so. I've been conscious of how important my past decisions affected this present I'm now living and possibly, my future. Particularly, I'm talking about the dating decisions that I made. I am really saddened by the poor choices I made and I think that maybe my current singleness is due to my stupidity and general lack of trust in God. Then, as write this, I think even this train of thought is just one more attempt to control my own destiny. At the end of the day, don't I believe that God knows everything that will happen in my life and my past has been foreordained by him just as much as my future will be? Is an obsession with past mistakes really helpful when I'm looking to the future? It's not as if I can change anything - all I can do is repent my poor choices and thank God for opening my eyes to the fact that they were poor choices.
Last night, I did read a really encouraging blog - it's called Girl Talk (http://girltalk.blogs.com/girltalk/) and it's a blog that is shared by a number of ladies in the Mahaney family (Carolyn Mahaney is wife to CJ who leads Sovereign Grace Ministries). One post I read answered the question of whether a girl should tell a guy that she is interested in him. That's always something I've struggled with because I'm the type of person who would rather just communicate my feelings that not. The sentence I liked best was something to the effect of: "Wouldn't you want a guy to like you enough that he's willing to talk to you about his feelings, or even get up the courage to talk to you at all without you having to encourage or entice him?" It's really true I think because doesn't that then set the precident for the rest of the relationship if you, the girl, end up pursuing the guy? I mean, from the get-go you've put yourself in a leadership/headship position and you're also trying to orchestrate things in not only your life, but in someone else's life too. So, it was a good thing for me to read because I do want to be with someone who has the courage to "court" me. I hate that word "courtship" because I think it's been beaten to death with the whole "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" movement (which does have it's truths and a degree of wisdom). So ya, the Girl Talk blog is interesting and I do like reading things from a Christian woman's point of view because I so often tend to read works by Christian males.